The last few days have sucked

My sleep is screwed. I’ve had a few nights of not sleeping until the early hours and one of not sleeping at all.

Now I’m tired and just want to sleep all the time.

Every day I regret not going to university and hate that I didn’t have the strength of character to disregard my parents opinions and go anyway. There’s not a chance that I’ll ever go now, considering it would have cost £9k for a degree at the time I was going and it costs £27k now. Even the Open University costs £15k for a degree course.

I feel like my life has no direction and I don’t even know what I want to do for a career long term.

I literally have this same crisis about 4 times a year.

Still eating healthy, just not in the mood for blogging right now.

Haven't run in over a week. 

Yeah, life is great.

Goals Revisited - February 2014

Nothing achieved in January.. lame!

Many goals still outstanding.

Health & Fitness

• Run 5k without stopping
• Run 5k in less than 30 minutes
• Run 10k without stopping
• Run 10k in less than 60 minutes
• Run a 7 minute mile
• Run and finish a half marathon, no time goal
• Finish a sprint or standard distance triathlon, no time goal
• Gain more upper body and core strength
• Have optimal blood pressure instead of normal
• Lose some a lot of fat
• Cut down on smoking   DONE (switched to e-cig Dec 2013)

Diet

• Eat less carbs, eat more protein & (good) fat
• Stop partaking in office 'fat Fridays' EVERY week
• Remember that lattes (either skinny or normal) are not for every day
• Remember that diets don't stop just because it's the weekend
• Remember that eating well still counts even when I'm drunk, hungover, sick etc
• Alcohol in moderation / less frequently :'(

Knowledge & Learning

• Read more nutrition books
• Read more about running, weight training and general fitness
• Learn a language to a good conversational standard
• Dedicate a few hours each week to learning how to play the bass once my wrist is sorted out
• Keep up with current affairs
• Read more novels

Finances

• Save at least £1,000

Travel/Activities

• Thorpe Park!
• Travel somewhere new inside the UK
• Travel somewhere new outside the UK

Personality

• Think before speaking
• Be kind
• Listen
• Be helpful

Miscellaneous

• Stop biting my nails (again)   DONE (Nov/Dec 2013, hopefully I can keep it up!)
• Sing, laugh and dance more

Outlook

• Appreciate everything, even when things are hard
• Learn to view myself in a positive manner

Life

• Be happy

The weather is lovely today

I didn't go to sleep until 7.30am and I just woke up. 

Might take a walk in the park. 

Blah. 

Hopefully I'll be able to start running again next week. 

Next race is in April. 

I wonder how I'm going to negotiate running while my wrist is healing. I guess it depends how much my arm hurts! I might just have to go super slow and long. I dunno...

I can't do anything for the first 2 weeks so I'll probably take a few long walks to attempt to compensate.

1 week and a few days till surgery. Eep. It's come around really quick. 

 

It's also a bummer that I've been ill because my friends are having a party tonight and I haven't seen them since before Christmas. 

Rubbish, rubbish. 

Oh well, I'll see them next weekend so it's not too bad. 

Gonna weigh myself, put everyone's stuff in the spreadsheet and have a shower. 

I lead such an exciting life. 

Posts will get more interesting commencing... (?)

**PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**

Do not attempt to approach the menstrual Ani. If you do so, it is at your own risk. We advise that if approaching the menstrual Ani is necessary, you offer one or more of the following to mitigate the risk of a rampage:

*A warm, soft blanket
*Chocolate
*Cuddles
*A hot water bottle
*A mug of green tea with mango & lychee
*Painkillers

Owwww

Sometimes I suck at life

Definitely didn't make it to the gym tonight.

I gave myself a headache because I was stressing over my phone (which was fixed in the end) and I was pissed and grumpy and I think I needed a snack because I felt a liiiiittle nauseous. I'm also ridic tired from not sleeping till past 2am last night, so there's that.

Fun Monday.

Set my alarm early in an attempt to run in the morning. If I don't make it then I'll get out in the evening.

Wish there were showers at work, I'd totally do my run on lunch.

So today I ate...

Breakfast - large latte (coffee cup not pictured)

Lunch - salmon with watercress, spinach and rocket (no dressing)

Dinner - courgette 'pasta' (just thinly sliced courgette, but it was a pretty good substitute) and turkey/pork meatballs (I lost the other pack of turkey, dunno how, so I used the pork mince instead)

I also had a biscuit.

So there we go. Food, done.

January - Goals Revisited

I thought it would be a good idea to revisit the goals list I blogged about in November every month to see progress against them.

So, new year and a new start. Let's see where I am.

Health & Fitness

• Run 5k without stopping
• Run 5k in less than 30 minutes
• Run 10k without stopping
• Run 10k in less than 60 minutes
• Run a 7 minute mile
• Run and finish a half marathon, no time goal
• Finish a sprint or standard distance triathlon, no time goal
• Gain more upper body and core strength
• Have optimal blood pressure instead of normal
• Lose some a lot of fat
• Cut down on smoking   DONE (switched to e-cig Dec 2013)

Diet

• Eat less carbs, eat more protein & (good) fat
• Stop partaking in office 'fat Fridays' EVERY week
• Remember that lattes (either skinny or normal) are not for every day
• Remember that diets don't stop just because it's the weekend
• Remember that eating well still counts even when I'm drunk, hungover, sick etc
• Alcohol in moderation / less frequently :'(

Knowledge & Learning

• Read more nutrition books
• Read more about running, weight training and general fitness
• Learn a language to a good conversational standard
• Dedicate a few hours each week to learning how to play the bass once my wrist is sorted out
• Keep up with current affairs
• Read more novels

Finances

• Save at least £1,000

Travel/Activities

• Thorpe Park!
• Travel somewhere new inside the UK
• Travel somewhere new outside the UK

Personality

• Think before speaking
• Be kind
• Listen
• Be helpful

Miscellaneous

• Stop biting my nails (again)   DONE (Nov/Dec 2013, hopefully I can keep it up!)
• Sing, laugh and dance more

Outlook

• Appreciate everything, even when things are hard
• Learn to view myself in a positive manner

Life

• Be happy

 Two down - so far, so good.

Happy New Year!

Here's to 2014!

So many things to accomplish. I'm very excited about the coming year!

Blarghhhhghhghh

I was going to go for a run this morning but I failed on that part since I was up till 1am buying Christmas stuff. Good job, me.

Must go to bed early tonight.

Today is a better food day, though. I had a small latte this morning (not great, but whatever), lunch is soup and dinner is chicken & salad. Not brilliant, but better, so that's good.

We had a family discussion last night on fitness/health goals for 2014 which was pretty good. My mum's been ill recently with what I assume is Norovirus and it's spurred her on to get healthier. She made a really good point last night, she said "my one word for next year is consistency". I think she really hit the nail on the head with that. Being consistent with a healthy diet and exercise is definitely better than taking it to extremes which inevitably makes you stop and start.

We decided that I'm going to be in charge of dinner during the week and on Sundays, my mum can cook whatever she wants for our family dinner but I'm in charge of the portion sizes. I think it will be a pretty good system.

The fact is, my whole family (myself firmly included) eat too much and move too little. My mum and I both have sedentary jobs and don't walk all that much on a daily basis. I need to use my pedometer more just so I know how how much I'm doing, and try to increase it. I think I might get one for mum too. Regardless of runs or gym workouts, I'm not doing enough normal movement and that's something I definitely need to change.

My grandma moves even less, she takes the car whenever she leaves the house and stays at home for most of the day. It's to the point where her thigh muscles burn when she walks for about 2 minutes, it's really terrible.

My dad is the most active day-to-day as his job is a manual job; he travels here, there and everywhere as well as lifts heavy stuff a lot of the time. 

Weekends are where we all fall down though (especially me recently) since I'll have at least one day where I don't really leave my bed.

We're also going to tackle the big "S" (smoking). Just small changes at a time, phasing it out slowly. Hopefully this will work for all of us!

In other news, I haven't bitten my nails in a few weeks. My nails were once again in horrible condition so my mum said she'd pay for a shellac manicure at Christmas if I stopped biting them. I still bite my cuticles, though. I've bought some nail strengthening polish and cuticle cream so hopefully I can make them all nice and pretty.

This was kind of boring, sorry (I'm not sorry).

I've had the beginnings of a migraine all day

Go away, world. That is all.

Rubbish

It's just slightly too dark to run right now (I'm not going into a creepy park in the dark on my own, it sounds like the start of your typical horror movie... maybe I'll get over this one day) and I need to get ready for the 2013 Business Show (or whatever the correct title is) so I guess I'm not training today, which I'm kinda bummed about. I keep looking out the window every minute to see if it's getting lighter. It's not.

The good thing is that I'll probably be on my feet for most of the day walking around a big exhibition centre.

I still feel like a lazy whale. True story.

It's still dark.

The charity 5k is on Sunday and if I don't get a session in before then, I'll still have 7 training sessions to go before I complete the programme. Yeahhhh I'm behind. Getting ill really screws up your plans. I've resigned myself to the fact that there's no way I'll be able to run the whole distance or even use it to get my base time, but that's okay (I'm trying to convince myself, but I'm pretty disappointed...)

I'm also supposed to go out drinking on Friday (bad for diet, probably bad for an attempt at running on Sunday) so I have this sneaky plan of ordering lime & soda water when I get drinks. I haven't quite thought about how I'm going to avoid friends buying me drinks, though... I mean, I COULD be straight and say "I've got a 5k on Sunday so I can't get ruined for that"; but I'm pretty I'd get "oh, it's okay, we'll just have one or two drinks" and then the one or two turns into sambuca shots and jagerbombs.

Don't pretend like this doesn't happen to you.

Anyway, I think by the time of the February 5k I'll be good to go. That's just over 2 months away so I've got a while to get better at this running thing (why did I decide to start running?). I plan to keep up training over the Christmas break too. Guilt free Christmas dinner, maybe? I hope so.

The one good thing is that I think I'm doing well on the training programme in comparison to others (and being severely fat, this is a wonderful thing). I stalked the My Fitness Pal forums a while ago and they have a Zombies, Run! 5k training thread. For a while I've been running for longer and further than a few people that have posted their times, so that gives me hope.

Yep, still dark.

Busy, busy

Work is busy and I was at a conference all day yesterday.

I might've had chips at lunch today (I did).

I'm really sleepy.

I went belly dancing last night and it was very fun. Practice, practice, practice.

Can't seem to type in long sentences. Cool.

Normal blogging to resume... post-winter(?)

No motivation to go to the gym

When it's dark at 4.30pm. I hate winter.

Let's be honest, I probably won't get to the gym this side of the new year.

I will still run though, at least it's light in the morning. Compromise? We'll go with that.

#failingatlife
#imgonnabefatforever
#idontevencare
#letmehibernate

Body pump ain't happening

My legs hurt. I fail at life.

Probably shouldn't lift things till after the operation anyway, but oh well. Maybe next week.

Catching Fire.... wooo!

Going to see Catching Fire with the bestie on Saturday, can't wait!

I haven't been to the cinema in over a year.

Exciting times.

It's so cold. Seriously, brrrrrr.

I'm currently in bed and going to watch some Supernatural.

Run tomorrow, fun times. Body pump... maybe.

I also have my 2nd appointment with the hand specialist surgeon dude tomorrow. Surgery scheduling, what a barrel of fun.

My laziness knows no bounds

I've needed to pee for the longest time, but I can't be bothered to get out of my chair.

Yep.